Down 24

My life has been a lot like this roller coaster. Not just ups and downs, but several twists and turns. Sometimes I am whooping for joy, hands in the air ready for the what lies ahead while at other times I can see a loop or drop coming and the dread is palatable, the nausea is real.

And also like a roller coaster is my weight. I've never been svelte but I have been within the BMI range. I have also been overweight and more recently the scale put me in the obese category. And that should have scared me into action but instead I just made excuses or rationalizations like "It's because I use a wheelchair to get around," or "I'm sure once X happens I'll lose that weight," or (my favorite) "It's just water weight/constipation". (Like all I needed was one really good poop and I'd be at my target weight! No plunger in the world could have worked! Like comedian Ron White says 'Just one really good dump from a new pant size'...I digress. And grossly. Mentally delete this from your brain and please don't look at me that way when we see each other next!)

I have lost 25-plus pounds so many times and but those pounds gather friends and come back to find me. I know I'm a friendly sort, but I didn't want them to come back especially with 5, 10, 15 or 20 friends. I've tried Diet Center, Medical Weight Loss Center and Weight Watchers. And I've tried combinations of those plans to create my own special plan (because wine or cheese aren't included in some, I've even adapted these to fit my tastes!). I've tried Slim Fast and Shakelee, diet pills and starving. I am a weight loss professional. Except, I'm not because I've never been able to keep it off. I'm more like a losing loser with a big L on my forehead.

When I was in fifth grade, I got teased by my best friend, svelte Leslie Phiel when she apparently didn't want to be my friend anymore. I was proud of a dress that I'd sewn - this was back in the early 70s and long peasant dresses were a style- and Leslie said 'where it to school tomorrow'. I was excited the next morning to show it to her and her new friends, believing for some reason that it would be the ticket to get back to her good graces. Instead she called me Mama Cass along with her gang. It was over 40 years ago, but I remember clearly the feeling and the label and the association of being teased because I was not skinny but I wasn't fat either. 

So, this battle of the bulge is something I've been fighting nearly all my life. When I was pregnant with Michael and Delaney I gained over 40 pounds (with Matthew it was only 22, and it was because I was doing water aerobics four times a week and running around with toddler Michael).  

In January, I joined half of this country in making a resolution to lose weight. And this is a resolution I've kept. I signed up for Weight Watchers. And it's working - so far I'm down 25.4 pounds. The first couple weeks it was slow going - losing a .2 or .5 pounds. I tried not to get discouraged and vividly recall one woman at a meeting say she'd lost 60 pounds by losing .2 or .5 pounds a week. And there are women (and Jack) in my group that I look forward to connecting and sharing with each week in my meeting. It's a challenge having a 50-something metabolism that is slower than molasses (4 points for a tablespoon) in January. And that challenge is made even more monumental by the fact that my movement is hampered by MS and the fact that I use a wheelchair as my primary mode of transport.

Funny thing happened though- about three months ago, I found a fun and funky chair aerobics to add to my exercise routine (which up to then meant the stationary bike which can get tedious). It was just the ticket because after doing these fun routines, I felt stronger and had more energy and suddenly my weekly weight loss has been more like 1 to 2.5 pounds. And now I've added a couple music videos (Justin Timberlake and Bruno Mars) that I dance around to after the aerobics are done. It's not pretty to watch but it sure is fun for me!! So Uptown funk me up because I got a feeling!

I'm not done yet. I probably have another 15-25 pounds to go to reach my goal and become a lifetime weight watchers member. And I want to be a lifetime member because I know that this has to be part of my life to be done with the roller coaster.

Join me at this thing called Weight Watchers.