Skip to main content

Blubbering Idiot, Part 2

Wally and me watched 'Marley and Me' while I cried about Sandy and me.

Once again, I turned on the tv to keep me company while doing crunches and saw that it was the last fifteen minutes of Marley & Me. "Perfect," I thought. "It's been long enough since Sandy's passing that I should be able to watch this without falling to pieces."

Well, if ands and buts were candy and nuts . . . oops wrong saying. What I mean to write is that if I had to eat my words everytime I said something that was later proven to be false, I'd be a whole lot larger than I already am.

I fell to pieces within moments of watching. And dear, sweet, havoc-wreaker Wally just looked at the tv and then at me, cocked his head and began to lick away the tears. I'd like to think he was being kind but I think instead he liked the taste of the salty tears. He was curious when onscreen there was a full head-shot of Marley - again, he cocked his head and watched and them resumed licking my tears.

So now I'm sitting here with eyes swollen, cheeks blotchy and a post-cry headache. I will no longer (at least until the next time) watch a sad movie while doing crunches. Maybe I should just give up on the crunches!

Comments

  1. No, No crunches! Crying is good for you, me and everyone. Otherwise why would people and elephants cry when they are overwhelmed with emotions. How blessed you can feel so deeply for your beloved pet, husband, children, friends and relatives near and far!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

It's not a popularity contest, but ...

Vulnerability hangover

I recently blogged about my own #MeToo experiences and then went silent. (At least on the blog). Those posts have been read by over 1000 people, and that's a lot for this tiny little blog about living a life with MS and God and with a sense of humor. Suddenly, I felt like I was living in a world where people that read my blog had x-ray vision and could see my nakedness - but I didn't know who they were. It wasn't a good feeling. And then I heard someone discuss Brene Brown, in particular what she describes as a 'vulnerability hangover'. It's essentially the feeling of regret, like after a night of binge drinking, when you think "What did I do/say?" and then "I think I'll just hide out from the world." If you've never had that experience, kudos to you. It's shame, pure and simple, ugly and raw. So, now I'm on a Brene Brown binge, including all of her TED talks. Including this one on shame:  Brene, listening to shame ...

When an ass is so much more

  Body image. Body positivity.  Or about coming to an appreciation for a previously much maligned back end.  In junior high (that's middle school for all of you non boomers), I was given the nickname "big butt Bowen". It was a nickname that stung because I did indeed have a large ass. I tried to mask it, a difficult endeavor since the current fashion (and remember this is junior high when fitting in was paramount) was wearing hip hugger jeans with midriff tops and my disguise of choice were peasant blouses or dresses. That style choice earned an additional nickname, Mama Cass. For those of you that don't know who Mama Cass was, she was part of the Mamas and Papas and known for her beautiful voice but also for her large body.  All about Mama Cass I was cruelly nicknamed at a time when nicknames can really mess with a girl's psyche. And I spent a lifetime as that girl with the messed up psyche. I'm sure there are more than one of you out there that can relate. B...

Fall of Giants

I've long been a fan of historical fiction and just this past Christmas I received from my son Michael Ken Follett's most recent book, Fall of Giants. It is the first book of a trilogy that covers the 20th century and the first installment covers the early 1900s up to just after World War I. It includes characters based in Russia in the time of their revolution. While I studied the Russian Revolution in college, this book brought much back to me - including the chaos that reigned for years leading up to the revolution and continuing throughout. I write about this today because the Egyptian revolution reminds me of the Russian revolution. The Russian revolution started out quietly and largely as a protest against a harsh and autocratic government - the Tsar. The Russian people didn't have a say in their government and were very poor while the royalty in Russia lived large. The secret police in Russia often killed and imprisoned people for no apparent reason and there were ...