Skip to main content

Patient no more!

I am thrilled to have something positive and affirming to focus on - the results of John's PET scan came back and it shows all clear!! The Ziggy cloud seems to be moving and I feel I can see the sun!!! It was the light at the end of the tunnel that has been guiding us along the way.

We will celebrate with a dinner out on Saturday - and I'm sure it will be an ongoing celebration each time we are reminded, again, about the good news. The past six months have been an arduous lesson in what is really important in this life.

We took Michael back to school on Tuesday - and this year was a lot less emotional for this mom. Maybe it's because I'm numb from the many tests endured this year. Maybe it was less disquieting because it was his second year and we knew it was a good place for Michael. Maybe it was on account that his housemates were upstanding and quite likable. Maybe because Michael, himself, was so eager to return. Most likely, however, is the combination of the all of the above.

So the patient is no longer a patient and I no longer need to be the patient caregiver (I wasn't very patient after all!). I can once again return to my place of normalcy - that of wife and overly involved mother. And maybe, this year once school resumes, I will find my discipline and return to that comfortable position of "writer". I am feeling the call.

Comments

It's not a popularity contest, but ...

When being negative is positive and other wonky 'things' in the time of Covid

The world is upside down and back ass-ward. Know what I mean? I was chatting with a cousin the other day and her potential exposure to the corona virus. I wrote, "I'll say prayers for negative results for all. Don't like negativity but these days negative is a positive." Back ass-ward. Remember when we first went in to shut-down mode in mid-March? We were told that it was to flatten the curve of hospital admissions so that our ICU's didn't run out of capacity and to ease the virus' spread. It felt then like we were in this together, all of us were going to help beat this virus and stay home. (Aside from the run on toilet paper!) We were committed, or so it seemed, and our closets were going to be cleaned, our junk drawers were going to be a thing of the past, our garages/basements/and other yucky places were going to gleam. We were going to read "War and Peace" or "Hamilton" or other weighty tomes that we'd always wanted to read. We...

Yipee It's time for the physical! (said no one ever!)

Raise your hand if you're ever excited for your annual physical? Anyone? Anyone? Didn't think so. I think it's a particularly unpleasant experience for women. I know men aren't all that thrilled to turn their head and cough during their exam and I have heard the prostrate exam might involve a little more than coughing, but trust me guys you get away easy. I think the dread of the exam has heightened for me through the years. No I take that back - it's not something I merely think it's something I know I dread !  And it starts with the first task after the nurse calls your name - the scale. And it's not a little scale, I mean it's got neon flashing lights displaying what it says is your weight. And it never matches the number to the scale at home or the number I actually want to see! And then the nurse, who you just know is trying not to laugh or comment, walks you to the examination room where the second most dreaded part of the exam is about t...

Is that a wagon in the distance?

I fell off the wagon. Well, that might sound a little accidental. When in reality it was more like, "I'm getting bored with this wagon ride, so I think I'll just get off here." And then I kicked the crap out of that wagon until it was but a distant dot down the road. In this case the wagon was my commitment to that silly Wii Fit. I got tired of hearing that stupid trainer say things like "you seem a little wobbly today" (to which I would say something classy like "No shit Sherlock!") or for the scale to move ever so slightly - and ever-so-slightly wasn't  enough to keep me motivated. I needed more!!! So, I jumped off the wagon. Makes a lot of sense, right? WRONG!  But justification is a powerful thing and something I've nearly perfected these many years losing, then gaining, then losing, then gaining . . . the same 40 pounds. Heck, you could say that by now I have a PhD in Justification.  And here's the thing, that wagon is st...