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Patient no more!

I am thrilled to have something positive and affirming to focus on - the results of John's PET scan came back and it shows all clear!! The Ziggy cloud seems to be moving and I feel I can see the sun!!! It was the light at the end of the tunnel that has been guiding us along the way.

We will celebrate with a dinner out on Saturday - and I'm sure it will be an ongoing celebration each time we are reminded, again, about the good news. The past six months have been an arduous lesson in what is really important in this life.

We took Michael back to school on Tuesday - and this year was a lot less emotional for this mom. Maybe it's because I'm numb from the many tests endured this year. Maybe it was less disquieting because it was his second year and we knew it was a good place for Michael. Maybe it was on account that his housemates were upstanding and quite likable. Maybe because Michael, himself, was so eager to return. Most likely, however, is the combination of the all of the above.

So the patient is no longer a patient and I no longer need to be the patient caregiver (I wasn't very patient after all!). I can once again return to my place of normalcy - that of wife and overly involved mother. And maybe, this year once school resumes, I will find my discipline and return to that comfortable position of "writer". I am feeling the call.

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It's not a popularity contest, but ...

Rolling, Rolling, Rolling

I put my pride aside and got my ass off the grass and into the wheelchair. {I spent a couple minutes deciding whether to put an exclamation mark after that declaration or to put the period after that statement. I think the period better suits my mood about getting said ass into the wheelchair!} On July 4, Saugatuck has a wonderfully unique parade that includes quirky participants like the artsy-fartsy campers at OxBow art colony and the LGBT members of a local foundation along with the more traditional participants like Girl Scouts, fire trucks, and local politicians. It had been a couple years since I had been to the parade, this year, though, my Mom and sister were in town and I wanted to take them. So we loaded up in the van, including Kerri's wheelchair and my own. Once we parked, John asked if I wanted to use my chair and I initially balked but then remembered that it can be a long, hot parade and it might be better to have a place to sit. So, I acquiesced and took the cha...

Christmas cards

I sat down to reluctantly address Christmas cards. While our list has slowly dwindled through the years it's still a sizeable number, especially when it's viewed as a task approached reluctantly . Know what I mean? Some Christmas 'tasks' are a lot less taskier - like decorating or shopping or eating or opening presents. I mean, there's a whole different level of enthusiasm associated with 'tasks' that aren't viewed as tasks - I can't ever remember a time when I sat down to reluctantly open a present or eat a Christmas cookie! Anyway, I approached the Christmas card addressing with a less-than-positive, more bah-humbugish attitude. I poured a cup of coffee, grabbed the markers (I had to have a green, a red and a black one), the list and of course the envelopes (which John had already stuffed with the card). I turned on some Christmas music, but not too loud or it would distract me (and it really doesn't take much to distract me. Squirrel!),...

Don't cry for me ...

Song lyrics or titles run through my mind to often sum up a situation or add humor to one. Today, it's "Don't Cry for Me Argentina". Only today the title is "Don't cry for me anybody"! I mean, I get it, that people feel bad that I've got breast cancer and that I've been living with MS for nearly 27 years. And I've had other issues that I've blogged about related to #metoo. I get that it seems like a lot looking in from the outside. I hear your comments and appreciate your support. But here's the thing, it doesn't feel overwhelming to me, looking out from the inside. Know what I mean? I live the life that I've been dealt and do it with the personality and faith I've been given. Which means, I could do one of the following: A. Have a miserable, pity-me attitude that would lead to being  miserable; B. Lean into my troubles and seek answers constantly either through research or angrily with God, which would lea...