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When Our Kids are Hurt

I am the proud parent of three wonderful children - 19, 16 & 13. Can't even say they're children anymore, really - but they're my children. Through these many years I have had occasion to experience the intense pain that comes to parents when one of their children is hurt - by friends or circumstances.

One would think that once your 'children' are no longer 'children' that these painful experiences would abate. Not so - seems the bigger the 'child' the bigger the hurt. At least for this parent! On two occasions this summer my 19-year-old was dissed by supposed friends. Now if this had happened when he was younger - I might have called the offending friend's parents and had a little chat. But you can't do that when your child is no longer a child. Instead, you have to stand helplessly by and hold back the tears and feel the burning inside that is your heart breaking.

And then, if you're a parent like me who likes to write and finds solace in writing, you make your way to the computer and write about it. The burning subsides, just a little. The tears come silently but they come. And then, if you're a parent like me that finds solace in God, you pray that this won't forever dampen your child's love of life or silence his beautiful laugh.

It is all part of growing up - these painful times. These are the times when our children learn how to cope and gain the skills needed to become resourceful adults. Every parent had those experiences - and maybe that's why the pain is searing when we watch our children have these experiences. But it is so hard to stand by, especially this summer when what I really wanted to do was slash the tires of the offenders!

Now, that little bit of honesty felt GREAT!

Comments

It's not a popularity contest, but ...

When an ass is so much more

  Body image. Body positivity.  Or about coming to an appreciation for a previously much maligned back end.  In junior high (that's middle school for all of you non boomers), I was given the nickname "big butt Bowen". It was a nickname that stung because I did indeed have a large ass. I tried to mask it, a difficult endeavor since the current fashion (and remember this is junior high when fitting in was paramount) was wearing hip hugger jeans with midriff tops and my disguise of choice were peasant blouses or dresses. That style choice earned an additional nickname, Mama Cass. For those of you that don't know who Mama Cass was, she was part of the Mamas and Papas and known for her beautiful voice but also for her large body.  All about Mama Cass I was cruelly nicknamed at a time when nicknames can really mess with a girl's psyche. And I spent a lifetime as that girl with the messed up psyche. I'm sure there are more than one of you out there that can relate. B

Peter Pan no more

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Cabin fever made me do it!

Like nearly ever person in West Michigan, I have a serious case of cabin fever.  I won't waste your time however, complaining about the two-hundred feet of snow that's fallen in the last two hours. I won't share about the twenty or thirty times I've had to shovel my walk today as gusts blew it right back in my face. And I certainly will not lament about the temperatures that hover around negative double digits making your nostrils freeze together within moments of stepping outside. To bore you with tales of how we have to shovel areas in our yard so that our large dog and can do his 'duty' because the snow is deeper than he is tall and dogs for whatever reason cannot poop in the same place twice, is not what I will share. You will not hear about how when I open the slider to let aforementioned dog outside, gusts of wind blow drifts of snow inside and require a shovel to once again close the door.  Nor will I share how some roads around here are drifted shut be